Mo Hax

I felt pain reading the tweets from friends and reading the words about the death of a stranger, to me anyway, but loved by many.

My feelings surprised me. Why was I feeling the loss that Dusan describes in a comment on Prokofy’s blog? Others felt it obviously much more severely. I talked to one person for some time about it. I can only attribute my feeling to the same loss when a teammate at work or from the local community dies. There is a connection without knowing them.

Greatest desire we have is to be missed

I also rewatched Seth Godin’s discussion about ‘tribes we lead’ the other day. He says a lot of good thought-provoking stuff, but I’ll admitt a little skepticism for this very successful self-brander and tribe/cult builder. At one point he says, “The greatest desire we have is to be missed.” I happend to disagree and would say our greatest desire is (not to sound too much like Baz Lurman in Moulin Rouge) to be loved and to learn to love. Sappy I know.

Anyway, today as I read Prokofy’s post questioning the authenticity of the claim that in fact someone has actually died in real life I wondered what possibly could bring someone to perpetrate such a horrible hoax on so many, if that turned out to be the case. Let’s hope indeed that no person is capable of bringing this much pain upon people for the sake of feeling missed among whatever other motivations. We just will never know.

Real closure may be impossible in a virtual world

The toughest reality we face when dealing with virtuality is that we often do not and cannot know the truth about others. I have heard so many stories of heartache from those deceived and deep into relationships, some with the same sex that did not know it, others because the line between pretend and real was never set, or was eventually eroded.

What is the difference between ‘augmentation’ and ‘immersion’?

Dusan talks about the difference between ‘augmentation’ and ‘immersion’ with the first being activities that extend and enhance life, such as conferences, socializing, working, and learning; and the second, those that draw us in away from life and are characterized by escaping life, like pretending to be a dragon, Arabian knight, pirate, vampire, agent, West Indian surfer, and yes, I confess, a woman (for about two weeks. I just couldn’t take it any longer. How do they do it?) To me both ‘augmentation’ and ‘immersion’ are valid. Although immersion is a serious tool for simulation and educational role play, if ever the term ‘game’ could be used to refer to SL, it would be in this context. But maybe ‘book’ gives a better comparison.

Am I reading the book or writing it?

My wife completed her first novel and we look forward to an upcoming trip to New York to pitch to some agents in person. As one of her default editors it has me thinking a lot about creative writing as it relates to the reader, writer, and actual characters involved. I find in Second Life that when I think in these terms it helps me make sense of things and psychologically categorize them better.

When I’m ‘reading’ the book I’m taking it in but not pretending myself. I’m taking in what is happening around me and relating to it, but I’m still me. I might bump into other ‘readers’ as we talk about the ‘book’ (SL itself) or other books or stuff not involving books at all.

When I’m ‘writing’ the book I’m creating my own character with his own appearance, actions, behavior, plot and relationships. Anyone observing my avatar while ‘in the book’ might think I have completely lost my mind, but only so much as anyone who allows themselves to be carried away into the imagination of any author. Choosing which characters to play, much like choosing which books one will read, is up to you. The only difference is that we are the authors in the pseudo-modernist sense.

We are the music makers, and we are the dreamers of dreams.

Both are valid states of mind, that is, so long as we can tell the difference.

Deception v.s. Immersion

Here’s the dilemma. When do we know if someone, even ourselves, are being ‘immersive’ or ‘deceptive’? Few draw this distinction. Fewer communicate it. Too many trust what they see, what they want to be true, what they imagine, even if they are not aware of it.

It is hard enough in the real world not to glaze over things we don’t want to accept in others. Sometimes that is essential to keeping a real relationship going. We can’t just be looking for each other’s faults. But the cartoon nature of Second Life makes it even easier when we put on our avatar goggles.

People could unfairly be accused of being deceptive when they were instead being ‘immersive’ without the other person knowing it. People being cruelly deceptive can later claim they were being ‘immersive’ without the person knowing. The danger, as with many things, is in the expectation.

Spoiler Alert!

It seems best to make sure the avatars we meet know the distinction, at some point, though it comes at cost of some fun for those that prefer to fall deeply into the illusion without a care for the reality behind it, not unlike when reading a good novel draw you in. The more immersed in the plot and characters of a novel the less you think about who wrote it and how. This is the goal, in fact, of narrative arts such as fiction writing and film.

But let’s not forget the serious side of all this, people are using Second Life and others for business and real-world collaboration activities that often require full transparency and real identity. Many business people judge immersion and art as irrelevant and silly, barriers to getting real business accomplished, which is an unfortunate dismissal of the core business driver:  people.

I think I have hit a middle-ground by providing my ‘about’ details in my profile, with a spoiler warning jokingly referring to the shattered illusions that might ensue once you know Rob, the dodge-ball-playing, 41-year old, homo-sapien, father-to-four me.